All posts,  BB+USA

Boots! (Ch 18)

Welcome back to the long-running Fairy Blog Tale – where three weeks worth of travelling translates into forever’s worth of Fantasy and Fun. Our Family had JUST arrived in the Big D (Dallas, Texshus) and had gone all serious and solemn at this place. They decided to wander aimlessly (because they had already decided that THIS is what they did best)… and THIS is what happened next. (Recap of all umpteen previous adventures listed at the end of post).

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 The Family needed (they decided) to clear their heads and walk off some of the melancholy that hung round them after such a meaningful morning at the School Book Depository.  So they walked.  They hoped to find (they collectively imagined) something very, well, you know, TEXAN.  After all, they had come halfway around the world, endured endless plane flights and they needed something DOWN HOME, DOWNRIGHT, GOSH-DARNED AMERICAN!

And you know what?

They gosh-darned FOUND IT!

At…

WILD BILL’S WESTERN STORE

Now Wild Bill (whomever he may be) does not know of our Family (although one suspects he may have greatly enjoyed their credit card!) and has not paid for this mention on the interwebs.  But I am here to tell you, this family had their jaws dragging on the ground as they gazed unblinkingly around the endless shelves of Wild Bill’s amazing enterprise.

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Snakeskin, crocodile, bullskin … you name it, it had been skinned and made into BOOTS.

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Faaaaaaa-ncceeeeeee.  The Mother could almost SEE these Ladies Boots do a line-dance on their own.  Look closely now…

The Prince was very much taken by the raw-er version of the snakeskin boots.  The Mother was not sure about testing the fangs QUITE so thoroughly.

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Nasty.

The Princess however – as you may already be well aware if you have paid close attention to previous chapters of this Tale – was IN. HER. ELEMENT.

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And when Wild Bill’s Deputy thoughtlessly showed her some Pink Flashing boots in passing through the More Serious Cowgirl Boots…

Well honey…

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LOVE. AT. FIRST. GAZE….

The Prince – having been dragged away from venomous fanged toys – was persuaded to try on some More Serious Riding Boots. He liked. He liked VERY MUCH.

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Although perhaps not as much as he LIKED the CHAIR.  Which was in front of a mirror. And held him mesmerised – Prince on Horned Throne – for at least a quarter of an hour.

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The Mother was still taking photos of fancy-schmancy BOOT TOES. (The Mother – for those unaware – is NOT a fancy schmancy kinda gal.  She is a Plain Jane in her choice of attire.  But she does love shooting the Holy Heck out of Fancy.  It’s her way.)

And the turquoise jewellery for which these parts of America are so famous also caught her Nikon’s focus.  She yearned for some, but it was all so… well not quite UNDERstated enough for her.  Still, it was purty.  And gave the necessary dose of SOUTH for which she yearned.

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Wild Bill did very well that day.  And while serious part of the Mother’s head said “BAGGAGE ISSUES AHEAD” the fun part said “WHOO-HOOOT!”

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And for those wondering, NO, the Princess’s gaze did not lift above ground level for the next week.  (Did we mention FLASHING pink boots?)

If course, all this history and shopping combined to create some growling tummies, so the Family chanced their arms next door for some REAL Texas tucker…

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Where they ordered WAY too much food (it would be shortly they would finally understand American portion sizes and limit themselves to two meals a day) and the Mother tried some Iced Tea.

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Apparently sold by the BUCKET.  It was nice.  Refreshing.  (But she still found it utterly weird that there is no such thing as HOT tea in America.  Talk about culture shock.)

As the family dragged their full tummies and lurid red bags of boots back to the car, turned on their trusty GPS and headed south, they reflected on their first Proper Day in Tayksus (say it in a Matthew McConnaghy accent, people).  They decided that despite their dodgy hotel room, and the whole driving on the WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD thing, it was actually kinda fun.

And as they admired their purchases previously one unmentioned thing came to light.  Despite all her carry-on and determination that everybody else needed boots and NOT she, The Mother actually DID buy some Texas boots from Wild Bill.  But none of the boots she took photos of.  The understanding Deputy at Wild Bills knew a Plain Jane when he saw one and quietly offered her just one pair of boots to try on, just seconds before that credit card hit the register.

Ye. Har.

*Contented sigh*

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For those who missed earlier chapters:

CHAPTER 1 (The Endless Day)

CHAPTER 2 (LA Rodeo Drivin)

CHAPTER 3 (LA Santa Monica Forrest Gump)

CHAPTER 4 (LA Venice to Hollywood)

CHAPTER 5 (LA Universal Thrills)

CHAPTER 6 (Flights of Fancy)

CHAPTER 7 (NYC Rousing Reception)

CHAPTER 8 (NYC How’s Them Apples)

CHAPTER 9 (NYC F for Friends)

CHAPTER 10‘ (NYC Screens & Scenes)

CHAPTER 11 (NYC Cold Outside)

CHAPTER 12 (NYC 2 Giant Ladies)

CHAPTER 13 (NYC Top of the World)

CHAPTER 14 (NYC Walk in the Park)

CHAPTER 15 (NYC Audrey & Mia)

CHAPTER 16 (NYC final hours)

CHAPTER 17  (Texas, Elm St, Dallas)

14 Comments

  • Leenie

    YeeHaw! You wandered just the right way and found the mother lode! Texas should have the best boots for any taste (there are boots for sale in Jackson Hole, WY that make fancy look like an understatement). I truly like YOUR taste in conservative leather. But the rest of the family also found something to match who they are.

    I’m with you on too much food in U.S. portions. But not about wrong side of the road, hehe.
    Leenie´s last blog post ..ANALYSIS

  • Kelly

    I bought orange boots in San Antonio once, long ago.

    I’m assuming your iced tea was sweet? I’m one of those rare Southerners that prefers mine with just lemon. Acutally, I prefer hot tea (that I do sweeten) and have some every afternoon in the privacy of my own home. 🙂

    I smile every time I see the little Princess admiring her pink boots!! Oh…and once Wild Bill saw how much you were spending he might have made you a deal on that chair for Dash!
    Kelly´s last blog post ..Family, Friends, Food, and the Beatles

  • Pam

    LOL looks like great fun!!

    There is hot tea in the US!!! Maybe not in the South where its Hot!! LOL I drink tea, no coffee, bleck. Loose leaf tea is finally making a come back, it was hard to find for awhile. I purchased some at a local farmers market.

  • Theresa in Alberta

    Now those pink boots are just too adorable!!
    To get a real cup of hot tea you have to go a few miles north. Like to CanadaEH 😉

  • Donna Gunn

    I think I need an apartment next to Wild Bill’s. There is nothing in this world more lovely than a well made pair of cowboy boots and you found the motherlode. I have my plain Jane riding boots and my fancy city boots couldn’t do without either. Love your pictures of the boots!

    And yes, we Yanks do love our iced tea…by the gallons.

    • debby

      I am one of those iced tea drinkers. I love my plain with a couple lemon slices and lots and lots of ice. The last time I was down south, they simply did not understand the concept. I finally took to ordering hot tea and a glass of ice.
      debby´s last blog post ..Less Stress

  • constance

    In reading your lovely blog, I forgot to mention how much I enjoy the kookaburras at the top in the design. One of them used to come to our balcony for hand outs and when we proved trustworthy, she brought her youngster. Her preference was mince (that’s hamburger elsewhere) and potato chips were not on her radar screen at ALL. Wonderful creatures …..

  • Georgianna

    Wonderful adventure, stylishly told! I could imagine myself in Princess’ boots, I would have loved them at that age. Hey, I’d love them now!

    Thanks so much for stopping by. I do hope you and your Mum get to Paris soon!

    – g

    p. s. you can get hot tea here, maybe just not in Texas.
    Georgianna´s last blog post ..Paris By Two

  • Jackie

    If you wanted western yo should have come on over to Fort Worth, Texas. Dallas is more city. The Stockyards is where it’s at. When you get finished dancing you could go on over to Billy Bob’s for some family friendly fun and get that line dancing in you were talking about. 🙂

    Hope you enjoyed my home state.

  • Leonie

    Sorry it’s taken me a day or so to get to read this chapter, buy I’m so enjoying the Tayk-suss journey!! I know what I was like buying boots in Nashville last time, so God help Qantas in November when I try to board to come home this time!! xox

  • Leonie

    Sorry it’s taken me a day or so to get to read this chapter, buy I’m so enjoying the Tayk-suss journey!! I know what I was like buying boots in Nashville last time, so God help Qantas in November when I try to board to come home this time!! xox

  • Montgomery

    You can defintely get hot tea here in NY. I LOVE ice tea, but when it gets colder I’m hot tea with milk Gal all the way. NY even has stores that just sell tea! Can you believe it! lol Love those boots very cool.

  • Rhu

    Oh my gosh. I’d be lining up the pairs, I love boots. I’s be filling a box and posting them home to Aus, so they were waiting for me when I got home.

    I am so loving your trip posts, keep ’em coming. I am being so lazy reading them in the reader, but you know I hang off your words! xx

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