Pantry pandemonium
I spent the weekend away, with my darling sister and her Paris and my two ragamuffins.
We had a family thing to go to which was wonderful – we left our menfolk at home and had ourselves a little girlie roadtrip. Sometimes our boys don’t really ‘get’ the whole must-fill-every-moment-of-potential-silence-with-words thing – we suspect they enjoyed some ‘quiet’ time at home while we happily finished each other’s sentences.
And as we said our farewells on Sunday morning, I got a phonecall from my better half. It started like this:
“The kitchen is a mess and it’s NOT my fault…”
Right.
Knowing he had made pizzas for himself the previous evening, I demurred. He insisted. And then he explained…
He had just finished breakfast and left the kitchen when a very loud crash came from the vicinity of the pantry.
Glass was smashed everywhere and he couldn’t see what on earth had caused the commotion.
Axel was still outside and the cat was nowhere to be seen. He could see that a port bottle had smashed, and various other condiments had crashed to the timber floor.
Then he looked up.
A very beautiful python snake was gazing back at him from the very top shelf of the pantry as he systematically coiled and pushed another item from the area he wanted to take over…
Now I am pretty calm and collected about this whole saga – mostly because I wasn’t ANYWHERE near it when it played out. My husband (allegedly) didn’t panic too badly, despite being notoriously cool on the concept of snakes within 100 metres of his person. He used a long stick and coaxed our giant visitor outside (the snake was very placid and allowed the coaxing apparently).
The python was less keen on being coiled into this container – and Mr I had to UNcoax him from the leg of a silo before he achieved this particular feat. He wanted to take him a little further away from the house (I should point out that we knew he had been in the shed nearer the house a couple of years ago, busy taking care of any stray rats – which is among the reasons we don’t mind him hanging around).
And of course, my husband REALLY wanted to show the kids this amazing reptile. We estimate he is around seven feet long and thicker than Mr I’s wrist.
Dash thought Dad was COMPLETELY like Steve Irwin of course.
I decided to christen him Monty.
Monty Python. (In search of the Holy Grail. Or the port.)
We are hoping Monty waits for an invite into the house next time.
And yes, dear friends who have planned visits here…
I promise to check pantries and cupboards BEFORE you arrive. At least the rat population will be under control…
Heh.
🙂
BB
21 Comments
Mary Paddock
What a gorgeous fellow (gal?). While I wouldn’t have relished finding him by accident (like Deb said), I would have been happy to have him around (outside).
I’m glad you guys aren’t of the “the only good snake is a dead one” variety.
You did ask him to pay for what he broke, right?
Mikey
Ask and I shall receive!! Lol, that’s a big one!! I’m so glad you relocated him to a better place 🙂 Ahhh, the adventures you have there. I would love it 🙂
Mikey´s last blog post ..Somebody save my dogs from me
A Novel Woman
Holy sh!t-knickers, Batman!! And this illustrates perfectly why I do not, and WILL NOT, ever ever EVER live in Australia. Don’t get me wrong. I like snakes, have even handled snakes, even got stung on my bare foot when I was chasing a little garter snake through the grass. However, I draw the line at 7 foot pythons chillin’ in my kitchen cupboards. If I had been the one who found him, you’d be writing my eulogy right about now. (fanning self) (and shuddering) (and fanning self)
A Novel Woman´s last blog post ..Department of Homeland Whatnow?
Teri
He’s beautiful!! So glad he was relocated and not killed!!!!!!!
Teri´s last blog post ..Encyclopedia of Moi: S
Montgomery
Ah God bless Steve Irwin I miss him, he was great.
Your blog reminded me of time I was going off to work, I have to go through the basement to the garage. When I got down the steps, I noticed a toy snake was on top of the antique belly stove. And I said to myself oh how cute, a toy snake. Not thinking, where would a toy snake come from as the only male that lives here is my man and he’s 33? And would definitely not be playing with toys. Suddenly the toy snake put its head up and looked at me. I proceeded to scream and the boyfriend proceeded to take the snake outside.
Tami Weingartner
So do you think he followed the mice?
Leenie
Monty is indeed handsome (love the name!. Too bad he over slithered his boundaries and got caught in the process. Not everyone can’t claim they have a rat trap like that!
Leenie´s last blog post ..THE DAHLIES 111030
Scotty
Monty Python – lol.
🙂
Scotty´s last blog post ..Saturday/Sunday Sepia
Jindivick Wildlife Shelter
What a magnificent creature!
jen
Oh my LORD. I wouldn’t have wanted to be near it either. At least now you have an excuse not to go anywhere near the pantry – there might be another one!
jen´s last blog post ..Hangover cure
Kate
OH. MY. GOD.
Your husband is one cool customer.
Kate´s last blog post ..My quiet weekend
Fleur McDonald
My question would be: How did it get in????
Fleur McDonald´s last blog post ..Hay, bales of hay!
Kelly
MmmHmmm, I see….first thought was to blame Axel! Poor fella (and the cat, too).
That’s quite a specimen!
Kelly´s last blog post ..iPod Roulette – October 2011
Audrey
OH.MY.STARS. I would have to leave the continent. Immediately. Or sooner!!! shudder….
Constance
My question is ….. does Monty have a family and did he invite them inside as well?
Worrryworrryworrry…..
Tara
Snakes are the one thing that give me the screaming heebie jeebies. Even looking at pictures makes my ankle twitch (so I can lift my feet off the ground!) but that is an absolutely beautiful snake. Wow!
Tara´s last blog post ..Back to life…
Mummaducka
He is lovely. I would relocate him as he’d eat my little puppies. We’ve had 3 snakes in 2 days over the weekend. A big season for them I think.
Mummaducka´s last blog post ..Release the crackin’ poddy!
Nancy in Iowa
What a beauty! I’m surprised Mr. I didn’t just lasso him down, then carry him outside! I’ve held “my” half of an 85# albino python – beautiful Banana Boy!
Nancy in Iowa
Oops – maybe # isn’t a symbol for pound on the other side of the world!
Bush Babe
ha ha – I am logged in as BB – I could have REAL FUN in here muahahahaha.
You must ask her – I mean me – about the true “shed” of the snake one day…
(signing off as Jeanie because I will get in trouble otherwise)
JENNY TALIA
Oh GAWD! Tell me that f***er wasn’t in the house when I WAS?!?!?
I can handle most things…but NOT SNAKES!
Don’t like ’em, don’t want to see ’em, touch ’em, be in the same house as ’em.
I’m not sure I can ever come back now BB!! (I’m half serious!)
JT
x
JENNY TALIA´s last blog post ..candy, clowns & crying kids