Lovely Lacey
We have arrived safely back from The Wedding in Big Town on the weekend.
It’s always a relief to find that all animals are intact when we get home…
I am a worrywort when it comes to our dogs and horses –
and lately one furry friend in particular is the focus of my attentions…
…
This is Lacey, Dash’s wonderful old mare and main steed.
There was a Cagney once – am not sure what happened to Lacey’s ‘partner’.
She went during the couple of decades I didn’t live at Granite Glen.
But Lacey is an institution here.
She has had quite a career –
from pickup horse in my uncle’s bulldogging (steerwrestling) rodeo days
to polocrosse pony for two of his four offspring
to handy mustering mare for all the posse
to reliable kid’s horse.
In other words:
She’s ‘Bloody Priceless’.
…
This photo above is enlarged in Dash’s room, for him to gaze upon with loving brown eyes.
He sees a horse that will not buck, bolt or harm him,
who is content with puttering along happily behind the mob,
but who will take him fast when he asks…
What do I see?
I see an old, old mare.
Greying around the chin and a little tired looking around the eyes.
Her coat is rough from winter (despite being rugged and pampered lately).
I see a heartbreak coming up sometime at Granite Glen.
And not just for Dash…
But for my cousins too.
Those long grown out of this kindly chestnut mare
but with fond memories entwined in her presence,
like the happy knots in her mane…
And for my uncle.
For this mare has seen him through life stages, from
gung-ho young man through to hard-working doting grandfather.
…
How do horses do that?
How do they nuzzle into the toughest hearts and make a home there?
What chance to do the soft-hearted of us stand?
And how do we ease the blow for little hearts, when we know that terrible news must surely come sometime in the forseeable future?
All advice gratefully received…
BB
10 Comments
Anonymous
Absolutely priceless. I still remember losing my horse (and he wasn't a family heirloom).
Kids are resilient – tell it to them straight (but kindly) and give them room for whatever form their grief takes – and whatever questions that come out ("but grandad's old, does this mean…?")
In fact it's not wrong for a 35 year old woman to occasionally get teary about her horse that had to be put down in 1987. Is it?
– Hippomanic Jen (in memory of my much loved Normie)
dykewife
i wish i could say there was a way of easing such loss into the hearts of those who love but there isn't. it's a brutal truth that everything that lives, dies and that love can't change that. however, what can help is loving arms to be folded into when they need to cry, and memories of times past.
Debby
There is nothing, unfortunately, that you can do to ease the blow. Not a thing. But you take a deep breath, and you deliver the news, and you shield them while they cry and learn a great and powerful truth about life. And then, BB, what they learn about this is that no matter how big the pain, you can turn to your family for comfort until it begins to ease.
Jayne
Let Dash cut some of her tail/mane to braid and keep tucked away in a drawer for memories now while she's still on her pins.
Then, when the final day dawns he's got that little something of her with him which won't stop the sadness but he'll have the little something of Lacey forever.
Bush Babe
Oh THANKS guys…
As you know we have endured the loss of the great Cosmo, and my son still gets teary almost 2 years later. But Lacey is DASH's horse and he is a sensitive little soul. So I am extra worried.
Jayne I especially love this idea of yours… I will try to do that later this week.
Mom L
You received some wonderful comments, and I do like Jayne's idea, too. I've never had a horse, but my daughter and I have both said goodbye to dogs and cats that were family members, as well as a lot of smaller critters. It's always hard.
jeanie
Its not just your cousins who will feel the loss – Dash's cousin will be quite upset when that (long away) day comes. She is such a sweetie.
Anonymous
oh .. this is such a terrible place to be. I know – I've been there. The only advice I can think of is to let Dash know that Lacey is getting tired, very very tired and will soon be lying down for a big sleep and not getting up again. Would it be possible to introduce a distraction (not replacement) of another animal? If not a new old pony then something else that might possible ease the pain? Thinking of his cousins too, but Dash is the one who has Lacey closest to him at the moment. Unfortunately that's the sad part about getting close to animals in our lives. All the best – cheers Wendy
rhubarbwhine
(Thanks for sending me back here – I *know* I commented a few weeks back on this post – I *know* I did. But where did it go?)
You have such a way with words, BB, and I know how animals worm their way into hearts. I love Jayne's idea, really love it.
I am sure I had much better words to say last time around?
Mikey
As you said, she's priceless. It's SO hard to let go of an animal you've trusted your children with (and other people's kids too)
Tough times, I do know it. It's always a balance, as to WHEN is the right time. Quality of life and all that. Hard to make the right choice, but when you do, you know you've done them a favor by not prolonging the suffering.
Never gets any easier though…