Cruel goodbye
As mentioned in my last post, this week has been a bit tough.
It was a particularly rough time to add a final farewell into the mix…
Because, you see, our darling old dog Cruel had to leave us too.
It was time – it was past time, really, and we had to make the hardest call. She was 15 years old, her once-agile legs riddled with arthritis, and those clear, clever amber eyes almost completely clouded with blindness. She hadn’t been able to work for many months – and working with my guy was her favourite thing in the world to do.
She was still her beautiful gentle self, but had taken to barking endlessly at shadows. She didn’t rest well and barely ate … So we called the vet, took her for one last very slow walk, before she was held in the arms of her (very sad) master and sent to sleep.
We know it was the right call, but it was still incredibly tough, especially for the one holding her.
Cruel was my husband’s very first working dog after we moved here 12 and a half years ago. We got her from my cousin, who named puppies for the first thing she saw after a litter was born (in this case, a pair of Cruel Girl jeans!). She was already a working dog, our ‘starter’ dog as we re-entered the world of beef cattle production.
She was very small but had great energy (and loved chasing roos when she was young!). She had some ‘heeler’ in her genetic make-up and loved to sit at the back of a mob – while in her early days she loved to ‘sweep’ along the sides of a gathered herd of cattle, each working dog has their ‘instinctive’ place to be, and (especially as age caught up with her) the ‘tail’ was Cruel’s.
She gave us some beautiful (well fed) puppies…
…but she always adored getting back to work as soon as we would give her leave from the litter.
She was sweet and gentle and very un-Cruel (although she WAS a bit of a guts-ache, who loved raiding the kitchen if we weren’t watching!).
She held a very special place in our hearts – we can only hope she is now canine heaven, happily tearing around a mob of steers, gathering them in nice and tidy, just the way she liked.
This week...
14 Comments
Tora
Oh how sad 🙁 I am a vet nurse as well as a dog owner and know that, while different for all individuals, each loss leaves such a huge hole and so much pain. I feel for you at this difficult time xx
BB of Oz
I feel for vets and vet nurses – having to help people through this time after time. x
Rob
Beautifully written tribute to obviously a much loved girl!! I cried for you both as I read it.We made the same sad journey last year with our old border collie Jill….18 wonderful years had passed since we had picked her up as a little puppy; her grandmother was an Australian champion but Jill was a town/farm dog who worked everything from flies to cattle lol. She spent her last two years on our farm at Forbes and loved being full time in the bush. I will miss her all my days xx Hugs
BB of Oz
Thankyou… it’s the price of living with and loving them. Hugs.
Florence
So sorry B.B. it’s one of the hardest things to do. Just hold on to the many memories.
Ann
Hugs to all of you
I’m truly pleased her master held her, as tough as it would have been.
I read, not long ago, how people leave their pets at the vets, and leave, as they can’t handle the thought of saying goodbye while the final job is done. The vets say the pet’s eyes, their whole body language is extremely sad, as they are left with basically a complete stranger in their final moments.
I bet Cruel knew and was pleased her Master was with her.
My heart aches for you all, at this sad time. So pleased you got to have a wonderful companion for as long as you did. Lovely you have so many lovely memories of Cruel and how great you, of course, have all the photos to look over, to smile, feel sad and remember in the future.
Hugs xo
BB of Oz
Thanks babe. It’s a pain we all feel, in this job. It means they are loved. Wouldn’t have it any other way…
Andrew
When my father’s last working cattle dog was put down, he cried. How he loved his Cindy. It was the only time I had ever seen him in tears.
Your description of Cruel’s final condition matches our own very last dog Toby. We took him to the local park, having to lift him in and out of the car. He blindly staggered around for a bit and did have a sniff at something that interested him and then it was to the vet’s. We’ve taken four pets to the vet for their final journey, but his was the one that affected us the most. I suppose the vet cost a lot, because there was enough in the profit to send us a bunch of flowers a couple of days later.
Andrew´s last blog post ..Mother Brother Visit
BB of Oz
Yes – we are lucky that the vet came to us, so Cruel was at home when she went to sleep for that last time. It wasn’t the only job the vet had to do here that day (horse vaccinations, bull injury inspections etc) and it probably took the least time, but it was the most important one. Heartbreaking but so important. x
Kate
Oh, Amanda. My heart breaks for you. When you love, the loss suffered is so much greater. But at least you loved. xoxo
Kate´s last blog post ..All shall be well
BB of Oz
We love so much, and so many… it can feel overwhelming sometimes, but we wouldn’t have it any other way.
Kelly
My heart breaks reading this. It’s never easy saying goodbye to our four-legged companions and not something I like to think about. (we have ten right now, and it’s an aging pack)
This is a beautiful tribute to your sweet girl, Cruel, and I thank you for sharing her with us in this way. I have confidence she’s crossed the rainbow bridge and happily keeping herself busy until you meet again. ((hugs))
Kelly´s last blog post ..Heirloom Seeds
BB of Oz
Thanks Kelly… yes but I do think death is something we need to open our minds and hearts to a little more. It’s so natural – as natural as being born. We mourn for ourselves, mostly – for what we will miss. She had a long and busy life, doing what she loved. She wasn’t cossetted, but she loved each rub around the ears she got from her master, and each ‘well done’ she heard from him. She didn’t sleep inside the house, but in her own pen, alongside her fellow working dogs (she had no house manners, I can vouch for that!). We all loved her. She was a small but vital cog in our little business/family and she will be much missed.
Debby
I could’ve sworn I posted on this long ago, but see that I did not. I always love to see the joy on a working dog’s face. Cruel was a happy dog who enjoyed doing what she was meant to do. My sympathies. I’d always hoped to pet that dog.